Not Every Sister Is Sacred: Protect Your Energy
We don’t talk enough about how toxic female friendships can be, just as damaging as toxic relationships with men.
We often assume sisterhood is sacred. That every woman who calls you “sis” or compliments your success is a safe space. But the truth is, not every sister is sacred. And some women are sent not to support your light, but to drain it.
These friendships aren’t always obviously toxic. They don’t always start with drama or betrayal. Many begin with laughter, bonding over shared wounds, or a desire to be seen. But slowly, the cracks appear.
Have you ever felt yourself shrink around another woman? Questioned your light, your gifts, or your worth—after being around someone who called herself your 'friend'? You're not alone.
This is for the woman who knows she’s outgrown shallow sisterhood.
This is for the woman who's had enough of one-sided friendships. The quiet competition. And the female energy vampires who hide behind fake 'girl power.
This is your reminder: your light is sacred. Not everyone deserves access.
Watch: I spoke more about this on Instagram—see the reel that inspired this piece.
Red Flags in Female Friendships
Toxic female friendships aren’t always loud—sometimes, insecure female friends hurt you in whispers behind your back. They often carry subtle signs of jealousy in friendships that are easily overlooked.
Here are signs to watch for:
She’s quick to cheer… when you’re down, but silent when you win
She imitates your style, ideas, or mannerisms without acknowledgment
She overshares her drama, but tunes out when it’s your turn
She competes with you in subtle, unspoken ways
She needs your energy, but never refills your cup
She talks about other women constantly, but calls it “venting”
She asks invasive questions masked as concern
You feel emotionally drained after time together
Wondering if a friend is draining you? Start by noticing how you feel after spending time with them. Signs of jealousy in friendships are subtle, but your energy doesn’t lie.
Why Some Women Become Energy Vampires
Not every woman is malicious, but many are unhealed.
Many insecure women were never taught who they are, so they cling to women who do know, mistaking their confidence for arrogance and their peace for a threat. Instead of doing the work, they try to siphon their power.
These women don’t always know they’re draining you. They feel better when you're around, because you give without asking. You shine without shrinking. You reflect back what they could be… if only they chose healing.
But here’s the truth, Divine Feminine women must understand:
When someone refuses to do their inner work, your light becomes painful for them to witness.
So they’ll try to:
Dim you
Distract you
Discredit you
And they’ll do it while still calling you “sis.”
These women don’t want to see you fall—they want to see you shrink.
Because your light forces them to see the shadows they’ve been avoiding.
When you don’t protect your energy, your body keeps the score—even when your mind tries to dismiss it. You might feel drained after talking to them, caught up in their drama, or unsure why your peace keeps slipping away.
These aren’t coincidences. They’re spiritual red flags.
Unprotected energy invites:
Cycles of emotional chaos that aren’t even yours
Burnout from over-giving and under-receiving
Identity confusion—where you can’t tell your voice from theirs
Subtle competition masked as “support”
Constant comparisons that erode your self-worth
The more grounded you are in Divine Feminine energy, the more you'll avoid anything fake or draining. Protecting your peace becomes a sacred practice, not a luxury.
If you don’t set boundaries, someone else will—and they might cast you as your story's sidekick.
Traits of Women Who Can’t Handle Your Light
Let’s call it what it is: some women are attracted to your glow but resentful of your growth. Your confidence does not inspire them—they’re intimidated by it. They don’t want to see you rise—they want front-row access to your downfall.
These women often say, “I support women,” while subtly sabotaging the ones they secretly envy. And the most dangerous part? They don’t always know they’re doing it.
Here are some traits to look out for:
Backhanded compliments disguised as humor or “keeping you humble”
Sudden silence when you share good news—no celebration, just a cold energy shift
Oversharing your personal business to others under the guise of concern
Undermining your confidence by poking holes in your plans or downplaying your success
Constant comparisons—she sees your growth as competition, not inspiration
Passive-aggressive jabs when you start glowing differently or enforcing new boundaries
Identity mimicry—when she starts copying your style, voice, or ideas but never credits you
These aren’t just personality flaws—they’re energetic cues. These female friendship dynamics are often rooted in insecurity, comparison, and unresolved emotional wounds.
Women like this often haven’t done the inner work to build their identity, so they try to tether themselves to yours. It can feel flattering at first, but soon, the weight of their insecurity starts to dim your light.
You’ll find yourself second-guessing your wins. You’ll shrink so she doesn’t feel small. You’ll start to self-sabotage—until one day, you realize: this isn’t support. It’s spiritual sabotage.
Real sisterhood never competes—it celebrates.
Not Every Sister is Sacred—And That’s Okay
We hear a lot about 'sisterhood' and 'women supporting women'—but not every woman in your life shows up with love. Some came to study you, to compete with you, or to attach themselves to your light because they’ve never found their own.
And that truth? It’s uncomfortable, but necessary.
Not every woman deserves the title of sister.
Not every bond is built on love.
Not every shared secret was safe.
There are women who will enter your life pretending to cheer, but behind the scenes, they are praying for your downfall. They won’t clap when you win, but they’ll make sure everyone knows when you’re doubting, struggling, or slipping. These women mirror the language of sisterhood—but not the spirit of it.
And the moment you elevate, heal, or reclaim your identity?
That’s when their true nature is revealed.
You’ll feel the shift in tone, the backhanded energy, the ghosting when you no longer serve their ego. You’ll feel it when your boundaries are seen as betrayal. You’ll feel it when you no longer let them pull from your cup without pouring into it.
Here’s the truth no one tells you:
It’s okay to outgrow people you once called sister.
It doesn’t make you bitter. It makes you discerning.
True sisterhood is rare. It’s built on respect, maturity, and showing up for each other, not competing.
When you embrace your Divine Feminine truth, you stop accepting one-sided friendships, fake support, and people who drain your energy. You begin to choose peace over performance.
Why Divine Feminine Women Must Move in Discernment
Stepping into your Divine Feminine essence is not just about softness, sensuality, or spiritual alignment but also divine feminine discernment. This form of spiritual clarity helps you sense when energy feels off, even if someone’s words seem kind. Because when your energy shifts, your frequency becomes rare, and people with low intentions think it before you speak.
The Divine Feminine does not move in chaos.
She does not explain herself to avoid confusion.
She does not allow proximity just because of history.
Insecure women are often threatened not by what they have, but by who they are. Your boundaries, your aura, your self-possession. When you hold power and peace simultaneously, it reveals everything they haven’t yet cultivated in themselves. And that can make you a target for projection, sabotage, and subtle attacks disguised as concern.
Discernment isn’t about judgment.
It’s about energetic hygiene.
It’s about knowing who deserves access and who was only sent to observe.
The more you embrace your Divine Feminine energy, the more you’ll notice how loud some energies feel. And the more you'll crave stillness, privacy, and inner knowing. You won't want to explain your moves or defend your glow. You'll move in alignment and let God handle the rest.
What Happens When You Don’t Protect Your Energy
Here’s the part that most women learn the hard way.
When you allow access to women who secretly envy you, your life gets noisy. Your peace becomes disrupted. You feel off but can’t quite explain why. That’s because some spirits don’t just watch—they attach.
You begin to:
Second-guess yourself
Shrink your light to avoid tension
Over-explain your joy
Diminish your milestones to make others comfortable
Feel drained after every interaction
And then you start noticing patterns:
The friend who’s suddenly cold when you have good news
The one who competes with everything from your outfits to your captions
The one who knows all your business but shares none of hers
The one who wants you available 24/7, but disappears when you need support
This is what happens when we confuse shared gender with shared values.
Divine feminine energy protection means safeguarding your emotional space like you would your womb—with reverence, intention, and unshakable boundaries.
If you don’t guard your energy, someone will use it to build the life they secretly resent you for having.
How to Distance Yourself from Jealous Female Friends (With Grace)
Let’s be clear: Just because you laughed together, grew up together, or shared a painful experience doesn’t mean you owe anyone access to your life.
Spiritual growth requires spiritual boundaries.
When you recognize that someone in your life is operating from envy, projection, or hidden competition, the most sacred thing you can do is step back without drama.
You don’t need a confrontation to reclaim your peace. You don’t need a long speech to validate your shift.
Start by:
Sharing less. Silence is sacred
Saying “no” without explanation
Noticing who celebrates you when you’re winning
Creating space between you and those who drain your light
And if guilt creeps in, remind yourself:
You’re not abandoning them.
You’re choosing yourself.
Some friendships expire when your self-worth evolves. That’s not disloyalty—it’s Divine alignment.
The healed Divine Feminine does not chase connection. She attracts what matches her frequency. She is both loving and discerning. She walks with compassion, but also walks away when her spirit says “no more.”
So if someone in your life feels off, trust your knowing.
Distance is not always loss. Sometimes, it’s deliverance.
